Monthly Archives: April 2012

Add a little soul.

There’s different opinions going around and it’s a topic that leads to a lot of heated discussions.

Soul mate (s).

Can you have more than one? Does it have to be your loved one, and only your loved one?

When I was still young and naive, I used to think so. I thought that your soul mate was supposed to be everything, an all-in-one wonder. That you would never need someone else in your life to fulfill the needs you have, your soul mate would be enough and do all.

It is with a little bit of sadness that I let go of this dream. In Utopia, it might still be like that, it might still be possible.

If something touches your soul/heart in a way that urges you to spend some time on it, it becomes an interest (even if only temporary). An interest becomes part of your being, who you are, part of your self/soul.

MyLove and I are two different beings, with different interests and different on/off buttons.

We get our fill of intimacy (closeness) from each other. We share the same values and ethics, in that, we’re soul mates. We share love – we love each other. And some other shared interests.

Music wise, we are not soul mates.

Though we both like to read, we do not (for the most part) read the same books.

We have different ideas on the how and when of spending time. MyLove’s technical, I’m not. I’m all feeling/emotional, MyLove’s not.

So, is it ok to have some part of a soul”need” fulfilled by someone else? Is it safe to have a part-soul mate in something else that your partner can’t provide?

Can you safely cordon off a place in your heart for that “part-soul mate” and is it ok to do so?

Or is it all bollocks? Is the idea of a “soul mate’ only a dream?

Do you have one? Is it all your partner or do you share pieces with others?



Posted by on April 30, 2012 in Ramblings


The silent recipe.

“Spiteful words can hurt your feelings but silence breaks your heart.”

Silence = rejection.



Posted by on April 29, 2012 in Ramblings


People watching.

The more I see other people and what they do or how they do it, the more I’m grateful of who I am and how I do things.



Posted by on April 26, 2012 in Ramblings


Brewing up a storm: Ice(d) tea.

I like iced tea, not any brand, particularly Clover’s. But these days it all seems to have a funny taste to it. So I’ve taken to making my own.

3 liters of boiling water with 6 Rooibos tea bags

Let it stand for a few hours till nice and strong(k). You can also cook it on the stove.

Mix in 1.5 liters of clear fruit juice and add 1/2 a liter of water (all depending on how sweet your fruit juice is).

Chill and enjoy.

So far, I’ve used strawberry, pomegranate, red grape and pear & litchi.

It should also taste nice with peach or pineapple juice.

The Rooibos also acts as a powerful anti-oxidant.



Posted by on April 25, 2012 in Cooking


Love is like cooking.

You can’t make something out of nothing.

Any recipe needs ingredients, time and effort. Some of the Ingredients I add to my relationship: respect, love, care, admiration, responsibility, effort, planning.

You have to work at it to make it work. Don’t step into it too quickly, give yourself enough time to gather all the ingredients you’re going to need, to make sure. To ensure that you’re on the right page of the book.

I’ve been adding ingredients to my marriage for 21 years and I recon it’s working quite well.

Love/marriage/commitment is a hungry recipe. You never stop adding ingredients.

But the return on your adding is quite fulfilling as you’ll be receiving as well.




Posted by on April 24, 2012 in Ramblings


Eating (in)to another’s soul.

What would make one tell one’s husband: “I love you and all, but if Bobby or Heinz would ever want to “push their shoes under my bed, I will let them . . . ”

Do you do it because there’s no chance in hell of that happening ever? Because you fantasize about it? Because you slobber on every magazine that even have the tiniest photo of a celebrity you fancy and don’t mind whoever sees it?

Have you ever thought about how it makes your husband feel?

And for the same token, the other side of the coin: a husband raving about another woman’s legs/boobs/ass.

Do we realize how it makes other people feel? How it gnaws into their soul?

I guess not.


1 Comment

Posted by on April 23, 2012 in Ravings


@ least is not enough.

Sometimes people don’t know what to say when they hear about your misfortune. They then try to point out the “positive” of the situation by saying: “@ least you/there/they . . . “. I catch myself doing this as well. I hate it.

We can’t have children. @ least you still have each other . . .

I have a stupid boss. @ least you still have a work . . .

My husband is an asshole. @ least you’re not alone . . .

My feet are sore. @ least you still have feet . . .

As if they want to tell you it could have been worse. Really? Like you don’t know!?!

When I choose to share my misfortune with you, it’s because I really want to share how I feel with someone who cares. Otherwise I would have kept it to myself.

I really know it could have been worse and that there’s lots that I need to be thankful for. That’s not why I’m sharing.

Give me a hug, tell me you know how it feels or just shut up. I’ve already run through all the “@ least”s by myself even before I told you ( and came up with a lot more that you could ever think of!). Repeating it does not make it any better or more real.

@ least is not helping . . .



Posted by on April 20, 2012 in Ramblings